I have always been “one of those.” Meaning, I was born with crappy genes, leaning towards being overweight or obese. When I was a teenager, or even in my 20s and early 30s, this was not too much of an issue. I would simply put on the brakes for a while, eat a little less and the weight would come off. I never liked working out, but I did like dancing and martial arts and did both for a short while, then quit altogether in my mid 20s.
I struggled with body image my entire life. Even when I was a mere 95 lbs. I felt fat. I constantly dieted, sometimes more than other times and while most of it worked for a short while, within no time my body would creep back to being a pudding. After a while I simply gave up, let myself go and started chanting along with the rest about being “curvy” and pretending to like myself the way I was. I never did. I am 5’3″ and swung from 140 lbs to 165 lbs up until a year and a few months ago.
When I turned 40, I had gained another 20 lbs within a year and had reached maximum density. I was 165 lbs and a size 13/14. I got scared and ran to the doctor, who couldn’t find anything wrong with me. This is when I figured out that I had nothing and no one left to blame but me. I decided that I wanted to be healthy, not thin! I didn’t like that I couldn’t fit in the clothes I wanted to fit in, that I would be out of breath when climbing a set of stairs and that I had constant back and neck problems, not to mention how tired and drained I felt most of the time.
I first did hypnotherapy for weight loss, and then signed up with a trainer. This was November 2nd, 2009. I started out at a sad 38% body fat and I am now at 28%. I have another 10% to go until I reach the athletic range.
The thing is that this whole crap they are selling on TV about getting in shape within a month is total BS! Any woman in her 40s will not lose 20% body fat within a month or even three months! Unless, of course, you are jobless, spend hours in the gym every day and eat nothing but vegetables and chicken. No one ever told me that getting in shape required not only hard work, but an ongoing commitment. It isn’t a diet or something one does for a short while, but it is something you either do, or you don’t. If you go on a diet, you’ll lose the weight but you’ll gain it right back as soon as you eat “normal” again. I would know I have tried them almost all.
To consistently lose weight one has to burn more than one consumes, and that by itself is difficult. At 40 the metabolism slows down considerably. This roughly translates into your body needing a lot less calories. So, if you merely continue to eat the way you always have, you will gain weight, period. Burning fat is also difficult. The only way one will consistently burn fat is to create more muscle. I don’t have to explain why building muscle is really hard.
On the bright side, the more muscle one has, the less one has to do cardio! I know people who run for an hour on the treadmill, when all one really needs is a good 20 to 30 minutes of interval training. If you do a decent weight training consistently, you don’t need to do, as a matter of fact, shouldn’t do, more than 30 minutes of cardio. Apparently, one starts burning muscle after half hour. Cardio works for me, because I do 2 minute or 3 minute intervals of what I do. I sprint for a minute, then run for maybe 3, then walk fast, then incline up to 15, etc. Within these 30 minutes I do things as inconsistently as possible, which keeps the heart rate up and keeps burning fat.
I do 4 to 5 days a week of training with a trainer. I used to do 3 days a week. My trainer focuses predominantly on my core, balance and strength, which really starts building muscle fast. I have fairly good muscle mass in my legs and arms now, even in my stomach and glutes. I can balance decently; I have better coordination, endurance and quite a bit of strength. I can actually do “real” pushups and planks.
Getting in shape has become a lifestyle for me, versus a timed event I’d stop sooner or later. There is nothing easy about it. The time commitment alone is brutal, so is realizing how long it truly takes to lose fat! Getting into real shape will take me about 3 years realistically. If I am lucky I can do it in 2 years. Even though I have started building muscle, I still have a lot of fat on the usual areas most women do, i.e. thighs, stomach, butt and back/bra line. According to the “experts,” one is still overweight at 28% body fat! I also still struggle with food, because I simply don’t have time to prepare real meals too often. However, I have pretty much kicked my fast food habit and I do prefer raw fruits and vegetables over a cheeseburger any time now J
I am 41 years old, I work a full-time career and I also see a cognitive behavioral therapist once a week. I spend every night of the week in the gym or at therapy and I drag my butt into the gym every Sunday morning. I work hard but the progress is slow, really slow. This is the part that can be discouraging and this is the part where many people give up. This is where I used to give up!
I am sharing my experience to let people know that it is possible, but that it does take time. Every body is different and most of us do not have the genes or metabolisms of the fitness models they are showing in infomercials. Most of us also don’t have the time or money an actress, model or recording artist will have. Plus, most of our jobs do not require being in shape or looking perfect. That requirement comes courtesy of our society and the entire BS we are being sold on TV and in magazines. Having said that though, it is possible to get in shape and to get the body and health you want; it just will take you longer than what they are trying to sell you.
I think the most important muscle I am working out here is my brain. Coming up with the will-power and determination to do what I have to do in order to become the person I feel I deserve to be, inside and out, is harder than doing the motions with the other muscles. Not allowing myself to get discouraged, or giving up, not self-sabotaging or making excuses when I am drained and tired is the true work I am doing here.
The rewards are also pretty significant. Seeing what my body can do now, watching it slowly transform, having tons more energy and no back or neck problems anymore are great motivators in itself; but again, it is my brain that benefits the most. The endorphins that are being released, creating a true sense of almost euphoria and well-being are better than any other thing I have ever experienced. I simply start getting grouchy and depressed when I can’t work out after a couple weeks.
There is no magic pill out there. There is no diet or fad that will help you become the person you want to be. There is only you and what is within you, specifically, within your head that will make or break you. In the end, it all boils down to making a choice and sticking with it. Find someone who inspires you by walking the walk. Don’t put your expectations so high that you’ll set yourself up for failure and surround yourself with plenty of “good” influences. You’ll be surprised what your brain is capable of and how your body can be slowly transformed into a well-oiled machine that not only feels but also looks good.
